Rock, Scissor, Paper

Almost everyone I knew thinks that rock music is bad. I think it's true... in some ways, and I've just given myself a tight slap on my face for saying that.

I love music, and music is my life. I'm not a composer, musician or know much about making music, but I can't live without it. Of all the music in the world, I still can't feel or understand country, jazz and certain pop songs. And techno I truly hated. (No offense to all out there, but you have your views for liking them. Please respect mine for unable to feel or hate them.)

And my favourite of all is rock (or metal) music. From RHCP to Marilyn Manson, from Linkin Park to Slipknot, from MCR to KoRn...and I love them all. The adrenalin pumping inside your veins, head nodding in rhythm and motions to the songs, the fabulous drum rhythm/electric guitar solo/bass solo/part of the song going through your head. Hey I'm real glad I'm not deaf from all that.

But as they always says, you can't have too much of a good thing. During my late teens when my life was a disaster due to some personal problems, I started to listened to rock "full time". Bad timing.

I'd became a hot tempered, rebellious, impatient, suicidal young man who thought about death everyday. I'd become isolated from almost everyone and only wore black. Only had hatred, destruction and rage in my mind. Anger was written on my face whenever I go...I was a walking time bomb just waiting for someone to light my fuse.

The time when I thought that I should really changed was when I was playing pool with a couple of my friends. I can't get to score a ball and I yell out "FU#K~!!" with anger on my face. My friend told me this.

You had a lot of anger and hatred inside you, dude.

It was then it struck me what an arsehole I was. I'd kept bottled up my feelings and not letting them out, not that I had someone that I trusted to talk to anyway. Or maybe I had kept them on the outside. But all that has past now, and boy I was glad that I didn't really hurt anyone back then.

I still listen to rock and metal songs now,about 6 years since my "Dark Age", as I still enjoy them. But I've reach a point that I'm not troubled or having sinister thoughts when I hear them now. I still feel them, but you need to filter all that negative energy if you can. I call it my 'Enlightenment' (what bullsh*t right).

But my point is this, everyone will have a lowest point in life, face your fears and problems and you will find that peak again. Look at me, I'm a perfect example... ha ha~!! But one thing didn't change though, I'm still an arsehole.

Yeah~!! ROCK ON~!!

Thought of the day: You call it an ATM. Not an ATM machine.

"Outrage"